Tag Archives: holiday

Thanksgiving: What does it mean to you?

woman with black hair and a gray sweater throwing red, orange, and brown leaves in the air in front of her Tag: 2020 thanksgiving reflection

Photo by Jakob Owens

Happy Thanksgiving!

This is a day that many in America celebrate by gathering together with loved ones for a special meal. 

But what are we celebrating exactly?

Unlearning 

I grew up experiencing Thanksgiving as a day of excitement and connection. I loved having family gathered together, eating my favorite foods, and even opening early Christmas presents from my snowbird grandparents. 

Only as an adult did I learn that this day is not one of celebration or thanks for all Americans. This holiday signifies grief and loss for many indigenous people who’ve faced centuries of genocide, discrimination, and oppression. Here are the voices of four Native Americans sharing some of their feelings about this complicated holiday. 

Re-membering and reparation

I find myself contemplating how to honor and mourn the pain of others, support and work toward repairing equity for those who’ve been harmed, and celebrate the harvest in my own life today?

This reminds me of the inherent tension in paradox, and also the deep richness of compassion and healing that can happen when I’m willing to sit with the both/and. This is the power of re-membering – of bringing multiple and varied truths into the same space. 

This article describes how the LANDBACK movement can contribute to reparation – “getting indigenous lands back in indigenous hands.”

In light of this remembering and repairing, I’m honoring this day by eating a meal lovingly prepared with my family quarantine pod, naming and learning more about the first inhabitants of the land my family lives on, making a donation to our local Native American Youth and Family Center, and soaking in every bit of joy, connection, and gratitude that I can.

brown wood table with green and red apples, burlap and blue cloth napkins, a light blue plate with 4 forks tied together with white flowers and a brown crusted pie in a pie plate Tag: 2020 thanksgiving reflection

Photo By Annie Spratt

Gratitude

In Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, Emily and Amelia Nagoski share a twist on the standard gratitude practice that gets at the heart of what matters for me.

They instruct us to, instead of giving thanks for what we have, practice gratitude for who you have and for how things happen.

This year I’m entering the holiday season feeling like I’ve been-through-some-shit. Maybe you are too? We worked. We stretched. We broke down. We found simple pleasures. We got up to do it all again. Even when it felt unbearable. Even when we were exhausted and the odds were bleak. We #persisted.

2020 was a dark night of the soul. 

Here is a list of the who and how that I’m grateful for today:

  • Chris, my best friend and partner in life, who sees me and knows me – all of me – like I’ve never experienced, and loves me more because of it.
  • The three humans I get to share this journey with, who teach me more about myself and about life than any classroom or book ever could, who fill me with such joy, awe, and ridiculous laughter – I couldn’t have picked better ones for myself.
  • My parents, who I’m insanely thankful to still have on earth, and who I genuinely love spending time with and miss incredibly much while they’re away half the year enjoying the sunshine.
  • YOU – as you read this. You who bolster me and inspire me within this loving community of humans working on taking better care of our precious selves. 
  • The way that life has unfolded. That even in the most devastatingly dark and scary times, there have been comforts and moments of magic and reminders of the love that I believe is at the center of everything. 
woman with short brown hair wearing a red and white floral mask on porch with table and chairs with 2 men and 2 women in the background sitting on porch chairs Tag: 2020 Thanksgiving reflection

Summer Porch Happy Hour with Chris, Brea, Mom, niece Dylan, and Dad

2020 Thanksgiving Reflection

What did Thanksgiving mean to you as a child?
What does Thanksgiving mean to you now?
How, if at all, are you honoring or celebrating this day?

Embracing the Darkness

Hello dear ones,

The darkest month of the year is upon us.

This season asks that we get quiet, that we be still, that we allow time for contemplation. Awaiting the return of the light, we are left to sit in the darkness. The dark places we try hard not to see. The places we don’t want to love. The grief, disappointment, fear, longing…these are the places that call out for the flame of our attention. 

Look around you, dear one. Everything in nature reflects this inward journey. Do not fear it. Even though it may look like death – like loss and pain and relinquishing control – this journey actually brings you closer to Life. 

And so we ask, and wait, and listen…

What am I grieving?

What am I afraid of?

What am I longing for?

What pain or discomfort do I resist?

These questions point us toward the cobwebbed corners of our souls that we would rather not sit with. The rooms of our castle, as Debbie Ford describes it, that we lock up and learn to forget. In her transformative book, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers, she writes:

“The castle is a metaphor to help you grasp the enormity of who you are. We each possess this sacred place inside ourselves. It is easily accessed if we are ready and willing to see the totality of who we are. Most of us are scared of what we will find behind the doors to these rooms. So instead of setting out on an adventure to find our hidden selves, full of excitement and wonder, we keep pretending the rooms don’t exist. The cycle continues. But if you truly desire to change the direction of your life you must go into your castle and slowly open each and every door. You must explore your internal universe and take back all that you’ve disowned. Only in the presence of your entire self can you appreciate your magnificence and enjoy the totality and uniqueness of your life.”

In the cycle of seasons – the death and rebirth of our natural world – we need this time of peeling back the layers, mourning the losses, letting go of all that is ready to transition. It is the only way to make space for new growth. 

And so, with excitement and wonder, I invite you to open a forgotten room of your castle. To sit with yourself and these dim dusty places, and to clear space for your own magnificence. 🌟

xo, Breana


December Oil Protocol. Siberian Fir - across chest. To assist in grieving, forgiving, & letting go. "I release any worry and blame  to my higher power."  Geranium - on heart space. To restore trust and confidence in ourselves and each other. "I can trust myself and others."  Myrrh - in navel. For nurturing, comfort and support. "I receive the nurturing, comfort, and support that shows up today." @brighter

PS: If you need help getting certified pure therapeutic grade essential oils and learning how to use safely use them, just grab a spot on my calendar, I’d love to assist you.

Happy New Year’s Eve!

Sunrise, by arbyreed on flickr

Sunrise, by arbyreed on flickr

The end to another trip around the sun. I suppose every day is the completion of another 365 day cycle, but I love the many opportunities during the holiday season to contemplate growth, gratitude, and intention, and so I’m happy to honor this one as well as a touchstone and a reminder to pause and reflect.

Looking back

Reflecting on the last year gives me a broader perspective on my life and its evolution. As I remember the highlights, the major events, the disappointments and the successes I add depth and interest to the portrait of myself today. How has 2013 shaped and changed me? What lessons did I learn? What do I want to take with me? What am I ready to leave behind? These are questions I can ask on any day, applied to any moment–yet on an annual scale I begin to sense how my daily decisions add up to the sum of my life.

Looking forward

Setting intentions for the coming year grounds me in my values. What do I want to create in my life this year? What do I want more of? What would make the biggest difference for me? Allowing the time and the freedom to dream, to see our lives outside of the stories we tell about them, gives us energy and fertilizes our efforts. New Year’s Eve reminds me to be mindful about what I create this year.

Cultivating gratitude

Eric Butterworth, in his book Spiritual Economics, says of gratitude:

Take a moment right now to engage in the experience of gratitude. Close your eyes and just feel grateful. Don’t turn outward, casting about for things to give thanks for. Remember, it is not an emotional reaction to the blessings you can count; it is an energy you stir up with you that is causal.

I believe that the enjoyment of my life is directly related to how much I recognize and appreciate the good in it. Using holidays such as today to reflect on this gratitude is one way to stay conscious of it. Starting off a new year with an overflowing heart makes us poised to create an abundance of good in our own lives and others’…it really is contagious.

Take time to stir up some gratitude. Spend a moment with your eyes closed and your heart open, and let the gratitude come trickling or flooding in. Discover your own daily gratitude practices, and watch your life change.

Choose one word

My cousin, Alisa, introduced me to the tradition of claiming one word as an intention for the year. At the end of my reflection I like to tie everything together with this one word. This year I have learned a lot about filling myself up from the inside, and am ready to leave behind the need to control people and circumstances in my life in order to be happy. I am ready to embrace what life brings me, to claim responsibility for my own happiness, and to trust that all of it is here for my own good. My word for 2014 is embrace. Embrace the lessons, embrace those I love, embrace the good in every situation–even when it’s hard to see. Embrace whatever choices I do have, embrace the contribution that is mine to make, embrace the uncertainty and the mystery of it all, embrace the love that flows to me from millions of unexpected places.

Thank you for being a part of my 2013. I look forward to all that 2014 has for us.